Things I learned in 24 years

-       when you get your ears pierced, make sure that you use disinfection spray on it. No matter what they tell you. Otherwise you WILL end up in the hospital. Trust me. I speak from experience.

-       don´t take any crap from anyone, no matter who. Be it your teacher, parent, boss, whatever. Now I´m not saying get in a fight with these people on purpose. Just be aware that everyone else is also JUST a human being. Make sure you know when to raise your voice and when to shut the fuck up.

-       relationships are amazing, but having close friends is everything. Pretty much all my friendships lasted longer than any relationship I ever had. And you WILL regret neglecting your friends for a guy. Plus, it kinda makes you a shit friend really.

-       test your limits, but don´t be an idiot. Like, drink until you throw up...but make sure you have a way of getting home safely. Hook up with a stranger...but use a condom. Essential stuff like that.

-       when mixing a gin and tonic, use MORE gin than tonic. The bitter taste is the tonic, not the gin. I swear, it will taste much better that way.

-       invest in gel nails, especially if you tend to bite them.

-       if you move in with someone, get all the worries out beforehand and talk about problems that might come up. Clear the air to begin with and it´ll be great.

-       make some kind of list of the things you´d like to buy, but don´t afford. You will need it when christmas/your birthday comes around.

-       music makes everything better. Be an adult and get a fucking Spotify account.

-       When you get on a long flight, bring lots of snacks. We all know that airplane food sucks ass. Also make sure you have the following items with you: deodorant (you don´t want to be THAT person), tissues, cozy socks, earphones, water, a toothbrush and some hand cream.

-       instead of getting a new car and worrying about every tiny scratch all the time, get a used one that already has a few flaws. My motto is: as long as it´s driving and the heating is working, I´m good. This will save you a lot of unnecessary stress.

-       don´t plan any major activity after you paint you nails.

-       and lastly: try and laugh as much as you can. If you see the funny side of life, you can get trough anything!

No, I´m not dead

I have been veeeery absent recently (aka the past months). I blame holidays, full-time working and my try at also keeping up a social life, which is harder than you'd think.

I really want to re-vamp my blog entirely and kind of make it all into one thing with my German writing too. It's all still only in my mind but I missed writing regularly for fun so here I go. Alright. What has been on my mind recently?

First of all, I just moved into a new place! It was time to say goodbye to my studio flat that I cherished for almost 3 years and therefore I spent most of my uni life living there. I moved in with one of my best friends (and her baby cat) and I'm loving it!  I will definitely share some pictures soon.

Also I went and saw my family in Greece and I swear there's nothing better than spending time with my siblings and cousins. They are all so sweet and funny and try to communicate any way they can (my Greek is nonexistant). My little sister has basically been my shadow for the entire weekend. I wish we lived closer and saw each other more often.

As I said before: I got a new job!!! Well, mostly new. I stayed at the same company but changed into a different department to work as a trainee. I need to write a blogpost about my experience of office life soon. Luckily all the people I work with are fantastic! We all get on well and the food at the company is pretty amazing too. Also two of my besties work at the same company so I always have my buddies there to drink coffee with and go for lunch which is the best thing ever! I'm dreading the day they leave tbh.

Yeah so it's a lot of new exciting stuff atm and that's why I want to go back to sharing it more. Let's hope I find the time!!

Life Update

So recently I have been very quiet on here. That is due to me either working or being away on holiday. I had a fabulous time tanning in Mallorca for a few days last week and am now getting ready to fly to my friend´s wedding in Sao Paulo tonight. In addition to that I am starting a new job when I get back from Brasil. So, yeah…everything´s been crazy busy. In a good way.

I thought I´d just do some writing as I am currently procrastinating sorting out all the stuff I need to get done before the flight. So here goes.

I´ve read three really good books recently: „We are all completely besides ourselves“ was recommended to me by a friend almost a year ago and I finally got around to reading it. It´s soon different to what you expect and it really makes you think. I probably wouldn´t have picked it up if I knew the story in advance, but I´m so glad I did.

Next on my list was „Girlboss“ by Sophia Amoruso, which I started ages ago and then decided I was „too busy“ to finish. It actually holds a lot of great business advice and I agree on most of her views considering creative work. She is about to publish a second book, which I am now really excited for.

In Mallorca I tackled Gillian Flynns „Dark Places“, which I have wanted to read since finishing the „Sharp Objects“ audio book. Up until the end I was at the edge of my seat not knowing what would happen. I read the whole thing in like 3-4 days and that is rare for me. Totally recommend it! Also I will watch the movie on my 12 hour flight.

And OF COURSE I got the new Harry Potter book. I am almost ashamed to say, I´m not a huge fan so far. I´m not even halfway through and I already lost interest. I think it is due to the whole thing not being a novel with magical, beautiful writing but a play so it sounds very matter-of-factly to read. I will obviously finish it at some point and hopefully enjoy the story but so far I´m kinda pretending it´s just fanfiction.

In other news I watched „Suicide Squad“ (three times if you must know, I´m not proud) and I really enjoyed it…I seriously don´t get the hate. I mean, yes, the editing was a bit jumpy at times and it tried veeeery hard to be edgy and fun at the same time, but for someone who always likes the villains best, this movie was just meant to appeal to me. Also, can we talk about Jared Leto? I don´t even have to mention how beautiful and talented he is. And how is the guy 42?!? 

What else? Oh, I watched „Stranger Things“ on Netflix (over a very boring, very long weekend) and it is actually pretty damn good. Although it had the same level of confusing plot holes as AHS, but at least we might get answers next season. 

Fashion-wise, I have been living in Hotpants and dresses but sadly already sorted out my wardrobe for more autumnal weather. Is it bad to be excited for sweaters and scarves in August? Halloween is upon us. Also I never loved ASOS more seen as that´s where I finally found an amazing dress for the upcoming wedding! Okay, I gotta go and finish packing...byyye!

Thoughts I had today

„Why does my throat still feel like razor blades after a whole fucking week?“

„Also my nose is so blocked I am going to die.“

„But: yaaaay, the suns out!“

*reading the new Harry Potter book* „This reads like fan fiction but okay.“

„This detox tea tastes like crap…“

Walking to the supermarket „It feels like a holiday…sunshiiiine!“

In the supermarket „I hate old people…why do you have to squeeze past me? you have all the time in the world?!?“

„Breakfast is the best thing ever omg“

„Why isn´t this medicine helping AT ALL?“

„Showers are stressful when you´re a woman.“

„Time to go to work…“

„Why do I keep DRIVING to work? I spend half my life looking for empty parking spots.“

„Can I park here? Hmmm, I guess we´ll have to find out.“

„No, I do NOT want to sort out a million emails, thank you very much.“

„Great. The only dress I REALLY wanted for my friends wedding has sold out while I was looking for alternatives.“

„I can´t believe I´m being payed to hang out on BuzzFeed right now.“

„Why is my colleague being so nice today?“

„Where do I get a dress for this wedding now?“

„I guess a banana and a Diet Coke is a healthy lunch...“

„All I wanna do right now is lie in the sun and eat ice cream.“

„Yaaaas, only one hour to go.“

„My nose is so red, I look like Rudolph…“

„There´s so many beautiful things on Instagram.“

„I´m living my entire life in a rush.“

„Why can´t anyone in this city DRIVE.“

„It´s RED you dumbass!“ (yes, I get road rage)

*at the physio* „It´s 35 degrees woman, I´m not having a heating lamp on my back today.“

„Oh fuck, why did they mess up my appoimentment.“

„What do you mean you can´t reschedule?!?“

„This woman is literally the devil and also MY NAME IS NOT TABEA!“

„Finally got a new appointment...Jesus!“

„But now I have time to chill, yay!“

„My dad wants to go to a beer garden? And pay? SOLD!“

„Also I´m going to treat myself and eat all the carbs, fuck it!“

*afterwards* „Oh god, I shouldn´t have eaten all that.“

„I wonder what the most dangerous animal is...“

„My dad is so awesome!“

„It´s 9pm and it´s still bright outside – I love August!“

„Why are my friends making me watch the Olympics?“

„I feel like synchronized dudes jumping into a pool is not something I will ever find interesting „

„Why does my friend keep texting me about mosquito protection in Brazil? You sound like my mum educating me on safe sex.“

„A mosquito net for 50 euro? Are you shitting me?“

„I love these new snapchat filters.“

„My friends boobs are so comfortable!“

„Driving home at night while listening to my Spotify playlist is the best thing ever...I kinda want to keep driving around for no reason.“

„I wonder if it´s going to be cold tomorrow? Can I wear a summer dress?“

„New Beau Taplin book? I gotta HAVE it.“

„Should I read that Harry Potter play before bed or rewatch Shameless?“

„I feel like I should rewatch all of it from season 1.“

„I also need to watch Orange is the new Black and Games of Thrones at some point.“

„Having Netflix decreases my productivity by 1 million.“

„This song is amazing!“

„I should probably go to bed.“

„Ah, hang on...let me finish this blogpost first.“

This was possibly the most pointless thing I´ve ever written, but it was so much fun. I was particularly angry today as I have been ill for like a week and it´s not going away. :( I did however have a good day, believe it or not haha.

Dating

Dating is hard. First of all the word lacks any real definition. Is dating being in a relationship? Is dating going on dates? Yes? With one person at a time? Or can you "date" multiple people before deciding on whether or not you want to be with them? If you're sleeping with a friend is that dating? Or does that word require actually going to places together?
Our generation has erased pretty much all the rules when it comes to romantic relationships, which is why definitions are hard these days. And that is exactly the point. It seems like you never truly know what the other person wants or even what you want because, unlike in other generations, there are so many more options than just being in a relationship or not. And that makes things difficult. We don't know how to act, how much of ourselves to put out on the open, when to talk about "what the hell this" is and when to go how far to send what message.
Essentially what me and all my friends do is try and seem detached enough to go "oh no, this is totally just casual" while at the same time trying to figure out if the other person likes us enough to let down our guard. We have all been hurt and we have all hurt people - it´s kind of inevitable. And while I think dating has become more honest, people also give up much easier. In a world were we can see if someone messaged us back instantly and we can just go on a dating app if something else doesn´t work out, why would we ever trust anyone or risk anything?

Attraction

Sometimes you meet eyes with someone and you just know that there's that spark between you. And other times there's someone you really like and you want to make things work with, but you're just not…feeling it. It is hard to explain how attraction works and I don't think there are any rules to it. Like, I was pretty sure I had a "type", but honestly that doesn't seem to be the case.

In my humble opinion, I think that we often feel attracted to people we didn't expect and it can take us a bit by surprise. Scientists might argue that it all comes down to hormones or pheromones or whatever but I would like to keep that amazing feeling of chemistry as magical as possible instead of explaining it all in a rational way.

I could make this into a big thing but what I will say is this: you don't get a vote in who you're attracted to. Be it a guy or a girl, honestly, if it feels great then why the hell would you care?
Sometimes it's a stranger on the tube or the guy at a coffeeshop. Or maybe it's someone you've known forever and never felt that way about before. Most of these little crushes are never acted upon - altough I HAVE actually been chatted up on the tube - but when there's even just a tiny chance, I say let´s all be a little more brave and just go for it. And if you fall flat on your face? Well, the good thing about attraction is that you never know when or how it might strike you again.

On Style and Reinvention

Every so often I feel the sudden need to change something drastically about myself. I never know when it might happen and what it is sparked by, but it usually results in haircuts, shopping sprees or even the little star tattoo on my ankle. 

I believe that there is a distinct difference between fashion and style. Fashion I consider to be things the media tells us to wear and trends that come and go, sometimes before you can properly catch up. (Stop bringing back the 80s flared jeans; I am still getting used to wearing 90s chokers again) Style, on the other hand, is something very personal and while there is a general idea of what looks good and what doesn´t, your individual taste has a huge part to play. It is also worth noting that not everything looks good on everyone. Then again, if you don´t like what someone else is wearing or how they are wearing it, try not to voice an opinion unless asked. I find that by dressing ourselves a certain way we have a major impact on how we feel. Some people might enjoy wearing colorful dresses, while I mostly stick to simple monochrome pieces, with the odd pop of color. Essentially I believe in wearing whatever makes you happy.

Here is the thing, though. Once you found „your personal style“, you are kind of expected to stick to it once and for all. I used to dress much girlier when I was younger and then sort of settled on a more grungy but still casual style for a couple of years. I still mostly live in biker boots, worn-out Converse and ripped jeans, but I do like to experiment with more out-there pieces sometimes, like lace, metallic or satin materials. While there are days when you just want to throw on a white shirt and a pair of jeans and be left in peace, there is also - and I would argue this happens mostly in the summer - times when you feel the need to really think about an outfit and make sure it works the way you want it to.

On a similar matter, I used to change my hair a lot. I had it dyed red, black and even blondish at times, gotten highlights and different cuts and in one brave moment at the age of 19 gotten a super short asymmetrical do that I still kind of miss. Whenever I did that though, people seemed to think, they had to voice an opinion or tell me things like „I mean, I preferred your old look“ or even „this isn´t very fitting for you“. And here is my problem with that: how do you get the idea that someone else knows what is ME better than I do? 

When getting dressed in the morning, visiting the hairdressers or even deciding whether or not to put on makeup that day, we choose what to do with our looks. And I believe reinvention is a very powerful and sometimes necessary thing. Why should we stick to what others expect from us? If you want to wear 50´s inspired printed skirts, go for it. If you suddenly decide you´d like pink tips, go buy some hair dye. If you are tired of everything in your closet, explore some new trends. Change is good and it can never hurt to get out of your comfort zone and try out some things. Whether you later regret it and say „Oh yeah, those streaky blonde highlights were NOT my best look“ doesn´t really matter as long as, at the time, you loved it and you thought you looked fab. I think looking back at yourself and cringing is inevitable even for style icons like Coco Chanel or Kate Moss and so you might as well have fun with it all, right?

Re-watching AHS

I have been re-watching the second season of American Horror Story lately. No doubt it was motivated by my huge crush on Evan Peters, but I discovered that after 3 years I genuinely forgot a LOT of the storyline. For anyone how isn't familiar with it: AHS is a very unique show that focuses on a different "horror story" each season. The actors often return, playing different roles, and as the name suggests it is rather dark, creepy and full of gore.
It's understandable that not everyone likes it, but "not being a fan of horror movies" doesn't exclude you from getting into AHS. Other than your usual horror film it has strong, well thought out characters, insane revelations and plot twists and the cast of a Scorsese movie. However criticized for plot holes, unnecessary violence and some very extreme scenes, this show is incredible. Topics include: religion, parental love (or lack thereof), sex (LOTS of it), insanity, redemption, rivalry, compassion and family. It is all there and I would argue that although it seems kind of gory and off-putting at first (especially if you´re not the horror movie type) this show often manages to tell unique and important stories and creates characters that you can relate to even though you try your best to hate them.
I love when a show, a good read or a movie make me questions my ideals, values and perspective and American Horror Story certainly does that for me. With actors like Peters and the amazing Jessica Lange, you can not stop watching this show. As every season is very different, I heard people say that they only like one particular one or maybe – like me – loved all of them but to a different extend.

I just wanted to share this as I've recently rediscovered just how much I love it and I definitely recommend it for anyone who likes slightly weird things that also cause you to think a little bit.

Summer Things

Altough the weather has been kinda weird lately in Munich and we´ve gone from hailing to sunshine in about 5 minutes, I still have hope for this summer. Especially after getting a taste with toasty 30 degree heat in LA. So here are my favourite things I can not WAIT for this (and basically every) summer:

• actual SUN (as I said: it´s been nothing but crazy weather changes here recently)
• having to eat ice cream super fast so it doesn´t melt
• the first time you naturally wake up from the brightness of the sun outside instead of your alarm clock
• getting to wear cute dresses/playsuits
• generally more fun with fashion seen as in Germany, winter clothes are all about not freezing to death and not so much about style
• open air cinema on warm evenings
• driving around with open windows
• getting a tan and those natural highlights in your hair
• the smell of sunscreen and salt
• days at the lake with my girls, where all the serious life stuff seems endlessly far away
• drinking cocktails at 3pm
• going to the beer garden with my family
• sitting outside late at night and talking about anything and everything
• beautiful sunsets
• BBQs
• all those „summer hits“ that you hate at first but then kinda give in to and start singing along to everytime they´re on the radio (which is a lot)
• yummy fruits to eat!!!
• Going on holiday (obviously, duh!)
• Long, soul-cleansing bike ridesand walks

My biiiig holiday

Recently I´ve been very quiet. Well, that is due to me being on a huuuuge holiday for almost  a month. First I went off to London for a weekend with one of my best friends for a few days of sightseeing, partying and generally introducing her to my favourite place in the world. I also got to catch up with some friends and colleagues from back in the day while there and visied my godmother in Norwich for a couple of days. Upon coming back to Munich I had about 10 minutes to get ready for a girls night out and then drove straight to a Spa resort with my mum for the weekend after that. It was her birthday treat from and. Needless to say we both loved it. Especially as we had never done anything like that before and weren´t quite sure if we´d like the experience.

After I got a few treatments, chilled in the nice heated pool and broke a sweat in the sauna, I felt surprisingly calm. The food and the hotel bar weren´t too bad either. We promised to come back soon – us both not being the most chilled-out people so anything that gets us to shut off is a real blessing.

Next I had a few days at home to run errands and prepare for the big trip to the US. I was excited, nervous and a little anxious about the whole thing...okay, VERY anxious. Whenever I plan a holiday I always consider what to do if my anxiety gets really bad, because it tends to act up when I´m in a foreign place or just out of my comfort zone for a while. Therefore deciding to go on a two week trip to another continent by yourself was a big deal for me. But I thought „fuck it“ and after just 12 short hours (haha!) I arrived in beautiful LA and was greeted by my friend Jina at the airport. We lived together in London three years ago and I hadn´t seen her since, so we had a LOT of catching up to do. Driving through LA in my rented – and wayyyy to big – car was absolutely insane. This city really stole my heart from the first moment: sunshine, palm trees and some of the nicest people I have met. My friend living right by the beach didn´t exactly put me off either. Some of my highlights in the city of angels included: biking down the beaches, visiting Universal Studios, Beverly Hills, the little shops in Manhattan Beach, the actual diner from the show „The O.C.“, the best burger I ever had and a London-themed nightclub. No wonder, I left heavy-hearted wishing I could stay.

But my second stop was none other than the big apple itself! New York really screwed me over weather-wise but did not disppoint when it came t nights out, shopping and culture. I especially loved the High Line and the area around Greenich Village as well as the fashion exhibition at the Met. Again, I stayed with my friend Rachel on the Upper East Side and after seven years, we obviously had a lot to talk about. Luckily she had the week off so I explored everything with my own personal tour guide. Even though I wish it hadn´t been so cold and clammy, New York was amazing and among other things I learned that taxi drivers and mad, brunch is a big deal in the US and you can pay literally anything by credit card.

My two weeks that seemed sooo long suddenly went by really fast and the next thing I knew, my friend Brian was driving me across the bridge and back to JFK. It is of course always nice to come back home. But I can´t quite comprehend that my little timeout from work and busy everyday life is supposed to be over already.

Now it´s time to get over that jetlag, head back in the office and start sorting out my life, aaah...wish me luck!

This might be really cheesy, but the most wonderful thing I took away from my time in the US was seeing my friends, whom I haven´t hung out with in forever. It soon felt like we´ve never been apart and we started right where we left off! Sometimes you really do make friends for life, even if you don´t get to talk to them everyday and I am so glad for friendships that last way beyond years, time zones and miles.

Things to do on an anxious day

Initially this wasn´t ment to be a blogpost, but simply a list for me to help me whenever I felt anxious. Recently I have mostly been feeling down early in the mornings (which is my excuse to sleep in) and after getting up. I assume it´s from not having a set „goal“ for the day or a purpose. Altough having time off is technically awesome, I hate having nothing to do. But anxiety doesn´t only act up in those moments. I guess it is just something you kinda have to learn to live with if you´re affected by it. Anyways, here is my personal list of things that help me when I get really anxious:

-       cuddle up on the sofa with a blanket

-       drink coffee or black tea

-       clean the apartment

-       do a guided meditation

-       breathing exercises

-       work out

-       read a book/magazine/blog

-       listen to music (mostly relaxing playlists on Spotify)

-       draw

-       write

-       leave the house

-       shut the phone off

-       take a walk

-       call or visit a friend

-       do something nice for someone else

-       watch a TV show that takes your mind off things

-       make/order comfort food

-       drive around for no reason

-       play guitar

It´s all going to be okay

When nothing in life seems to be going right, you sometimes just get stuck. And even though everything looks fine from the outside and you feel like you SHOULD be doing great somehow…you're not. This is really difficult to explain. In those moments when you just feel down for no obvious reason, you often need a good pep talk and someone that tells you it is all goind to be okay. As much as I believe in being your own white knight and giving zero fucks about how other people percieve you, having a friend or family member tell you they believe in you is necessary sometimes. Especially women can probably relate to feeling hormonal and stressed out and just generally irritated without any real reason. Suddenly EVERYTHING kind of bugs you. But when someone asks you don´t have have a valid response, so you just shake it off.

I have been in both sides of this: from giving my friends speeches about how awesome they are to sitting on their bed crying my eyes out and needing a bit of love myself. It is important to know, that this shit is totally normal. You may feel like the world is ending and your life sucks, but it really isn't and you'll soon see that you are actually doing pretty damn well. I have to give a shout out to my mum here for putting up with me in those times. Especially a couple of days ago when I started freaking out about the future and she calmed me down and told me I would be okay. Because that is exactly what we all need to hear sometimes isn´t it?