Here´s something a little
less philosophical and a little more fun:
Gin: „I am British as fuck
- or at least I think I am. Also I would never dream of putting a slice of
lemon in my GT. Everyone knows it´s either cucumber or lime!“ (side note: this
is me in a nutshell)
Vodka: „I want to get
drunk af and vodka seems to be the obvious choice“
Rum: „I am CAPTAIN Jack
Sparrow!“
Champagne: If you didn´t
guess this one yourself, people who excessively drink champagne mainly do so to
show how much money they have, so champagne really just means „Look at me! ´Im
rich!“
„Normal“ Cocktails (Mojitos
and Co.): „I am as basic as the cocktails I order.“
„Fancy“ Cocktails: „I hate
the taste of alcohol so I need shitloads of juices and other sweet stuff to be
able to drink it.“
Beer: if it´s a good
brand, you probably just like beer, cheap shitty beer means „I´m totally
eigtheen and I TOTALLY bought this beer with my real ID.“
White Wine: „I like
sitting around and talking about the meaning of life“
Red Wine: „I like sitting
around and talking about the meaning of life while knowing that tommorow I´ll
suffer a horrendous headache.“, red wine lovers also tend to think they´re
artistic as FUCK
Scotch: male version of
the basic bitch.
Bourbon: „I think I am
better than the basic bitch, but I´m not.“
Tequila: „Let´s get
fucking DESTROYED!“
Jägermeister: „...“
(trying not to throw up mostly)
Sambuca: „I love coffee so
much, I even need coffee beans in my SHOTS!“
Ouzo: „I got this shot for
free at a Greek restaurant and I don´t waste shit so here we go!“ if this is
really your FAVOURITE drink you need to take a step back and look at your life,
man
Side note: obviously I do
not judge people based on their choice of drinks but, well, sometimes you need
to have a bit of fun ;)
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